It's the School C, and I'm doing okay with that (quite frankly i don't care What i get, just as long as i get it done). I'm losing friends, but making new ones at the same time.


I'm filled with regret, I keep asking myself where i went wrong.

There are some people that you completely look up to and care for, people you care about more than anything else.
I had people like that.
Half of them hate me now.

I'm okay with it, We're all going our own ways. I'm letting it go.
But letting go won't stop the hurting. So maybe I'm not okay with it?

All my life, I've had trust issues, Suddenly i found people i really do trust. Where the hell are they?

On a night when i needed my friends most, i needed people close to me, I was falling apart.

It seems i wasn't the only thing falling apart, everything around me was.
My boyfriend dumped me, and my best friend turned her back on me.
My cry for help somehow turned into a scream of anger, I chased them off, pushed them away, and now they're never coming back.
Some might say i deserved it, But i don't think anyone deserves to feel like this. If i knew anyone felt this kind of pain, I'd try to stop it, the best i can.

I've got people telling me they don't hate me, and that it'll all be okay, and that they're always here for me. I'm happy to hear that.

But still, the pain won't go away. It won't ever go away, it seems.
In the quiet I used to spend thinking to myself how happy i was with everybody, now i spend glaring into space, confused, angry at why i feel so alone, when I'm not.

I've still lost people who were so important to me, I still feel the pain I felt when the words entered my mind 'I hate you' and 'We'll probably never be friends again.'



I just want it to go away..